The Wolf & the Hare
by Kitty le Fay
Summary: The five times that Rolf and Luna made love and the one time they just didn't.


**AN: My first Potterfic! Surprised it took me this long, but here it is. Because I have such a taste for the underrated, I decided to shine a little spotlight on Luna and Rolf's relationship because they don't have enough love. I'm also a little saddened by how little fics I see of their sexytimes, so here they are! Enjoy!**

* * *

They'd only met a month ago at work and while Rolf was reluctant to ask her out, he could never stop himself from admiring the little blonde who skipped instead of walked and spoke in riddles instead of words. He was fascinated by her smile, her voice, her eyes, her hair, her radish earrings. Everything about Luna Lovegood fascinated him.

What a shame he was so terrible with attractive women.

His last two relationships had failed because he wasn't "bold" enough, but to be honest, he was just terrible at making the first move with anything, even saying a simple hello. He could barely even say hello to Luna when he first met her. He must have tried to buck up the courage to ask her if he could buy her a drink several times, but he always ended up turning away and cursing himself. Even when she talked to him about things so mundane as work, he ended up tongue-tied.

One day he found her waiting for the bus, but it seemed to be taking forever. Somehow, and he didn't know how, he asked her if she wanted a ride home. He insisted he was just being nice and not, in fact, making an attempt to pull, but even as he stuttered like an idiot she said yes.

"That'd be lovely, Rolf," she smiled and she mounted his motorbike behind him.

Throughout the entire ride, he was fighting the urge to say something truly stupid like "You smell like roses," or even worse: "I really fancy you." The fact that she was leaning her cheek on his shoulder didn't help him either, but he did like how it felt. Sooner than he'd expected, he'd reached her house and he'd only just noticed, as she hopped off, that it had started to rain. Perhaps he was too distracted by how good it felt to have her arms wrapped around his waist.

He offered his jacket to keep her from the rain, but she refused.

"Thanks, Rolf, but I don't mind the rain. If you want to walk to the door with me, though, that's fine."

He did and when she opened the door she gave him that look. That look that seemed to look right through him. He suppressed the shudder it always gave him.

"Do you want to come in?" she asked.

The question took him by surprise. Perhaps it was the rain. Perhaps it was the hope of tea or a drink. Perhaps it was just Luna. Whatever it was that possessed him to say: "Y-yeah…yeah, I wouldn't mind." Rolf Scamander was now entering Luna Lovegood's flat.

He looked around. It was a strange-looking flat with strange-looking ornaments and decorum and there were books, paintings, brushes and paints scattered everywhere. It was as if it hadn't been cleaned in a year.

Rolf was about to say something of it, but stopped speechless to see Luna with her back to him and stripping herself of her dress.

"Luna?" he questioned. "What are you doing?"

"I'm taking my clothes off, silly," she said, turning her gaze to him with a smile. "What does it look like I'm doing?"

"No, I-I…I see that, but…_why_ are you taking off your clothes?"

"So it'll be easier for you to fuck me, of course."

Rolf was left red, speechless and breathless. His growing semi wasn't helping matters either. He wanted to say something. Anything. Anything that made him look less of a complete twat.

But Luna spoke first, now completely naked as she turned towards him. Rolf had often wondered what Luna looked like naked (and wanked his brains off to the very thought), but she was even more beautiful than any of his fantasies could have conceived. She was small and slim with breasts that still looked like a thirteen-year-old's and barely-there yellow hair between her legs. It only took a moment for him to notice that he was now fully erect.

"I know you like me, Rolf," she said, "and I like you. Very much, in fact. That's why I invited you in. I thought maybe we'd have sex instead of making those awkward glances you always make."

Luna was walking closer and closer towards Rolf as she said this and didn't even seem the least bit bothered by how hard he was right now when she pressed her body against his. He was frozen, eyes locked with hers and so hard it hurt. But Luna stood on tiptoe and softly kissed his cheek.

"I really like you, Rolf," she whispered.

Before she could step back, Rolf, sick of being so shy, took his chance and kissed her passionately. He held her tightly, only noticing now how petite she was against him. She giggled at his needy groans as he kissed her, pushed him to the sofa and began to strip him bare.

It was Luna who did most of the work, kissing and touching him everywhere. She kissed, him, stroked him, sucked him and finally started to ride him. It had been a while since Rolf had had sex, so a premature ejaculation was inevitable, but some how, Luna didn't seem to mind. She just continued to ride him until they eventually came together.

And it wasn't half as frightening as Rolf thought it would be.

* * *

Since their previous liaison, Rolf had gotten better at talking to Luna and even found the courage to ask her out to dinner. She said yes. They agreed on a nice restaurant with white walls, thousand-galleon paintings and a fancy name that neither of them could pronounce. They both dressed nicely in clothes that were too prim for either of them and ate fancy food that was so small it wouldn't have been enough for a starving kitten.

Eventually, Rolf grimaced and decided: "This isn't working, is it?"

Luna shook her head. "No, I don't think it is."

Rolf beamed and took her hand as the two of them ran away from the restaurant crew that was left to shake their heads at the ruffians. They took a takeaway Chinese dinner and walked and talked all the way to the beach. Luna walked barefoot, tired of the pinching those heels gave her and threw them in the dustbin. She even ruffled Rolf's hair so it would look its messy self again.

They talked on the dock for a long while before Luna ran to the front of the dock and jumped into the water.

"Luna!" Rolf called and ran to the front of the dock, kneeling down to see where was. Soon she popped her head out of the water, looking like some sort of water sprite.

"Yes?" she said sweetly, not looking the least bit bothered of how cold the water might have been. Suddenly, Rolf was speechless at the sight of a very wet Luna in a dress that now clung closely enough to her breasts for him to see her hardened nipples.

"Aren't you cold?" he finally blurted out.

"Bit," she shrugged. "But you get used to it. Why don't you pop in and see?"

Rolf made a funny face of embarrassment that made Luna giggle. "I'm not much of a swimmer," he said.

"Dragon bogies!" she swore and grabbed his jacket, plunging him in the water. Rolf soon splashed to surface with a deep gasp. He cursed her again and again, no matter how much she giggled until she swam up to him and kissed him passionately. Rolf soon gave in and kissed her back when she wrapped her legs around his waist.

"Apology accepted," he said when they parted and he kissed her again.

Their kisses became more and more heated until Rolf made his way against a rock, still between Luna's legs. As soon as Luna's back was against the rock, she reached between them and unbuttoned his trousers.

"Someone might see us," he whispered in her ear.

"They might," she whispered back. "Your point?"

Rolf's fear of being caught suddenly faded when he felt Luna's hot mouth on his neck. It made him shudder. He gave in and allowed her to stroke him to the point of hardness. In return, he reached between her legs and buried his fingers inside her warm wetness. It still amazed him how tight she was. The moon was so very bright when they came.

It was only when they'd gotten out of the water that Rolf noticed how badly Luna's dress had been ruined by the water and…well…

"Your dress," he said.

"I don't mind. I never really liked it anyway."

"Why don't you just throw it out, then?"

"What? Right now?"

Rolf chuckled, though the thought certainly pleased him.

* * *

The morning after Harry and Ginny's wedding, Rolf was awakened by a parched throat, a twisted stomach and the worst headache he'd ever felt in his life. When he was finally able to open his eyes, Luna was at the door in that little nightie he always loved, holding a cup of tea in each hand.

"Morning, sleepyhead," she chirped.

A long "Gnnh," was his response, along with a few "Urghs" and "Ows."

"That's what you get for drinking more firewhiskeys than me and _then_ dancing a striptease for the bride instead of me."

This seemed to wake Rolf up. "Did I really do that?"

"Yes. You're a surprisingly good dancer, Rolf."

He remembered now and suddenly wanted to die. "Merlin's buttocks, I _did_ do that! Rabblerousers!"

"You did and it wasn't for me. I'm going to have to punish you."

Rolf lifted his head with widened eyes. He wasn't sure if the smile she was giving him was either sweet or sinister.

"I've put a bit of antihangover potion in your tea," she grinned, "but I'm not sure I feel like giving it to you just yet."

"What?"

"You're going to have to pay for it first."

"And how, exactly, am I to do that?"

"You don't have to do much," she said, placing the cups on the bedside table and crawling atop of him like a cat. "Just lie down, like a good boy, and accept your punishment."

Luna unbuttoned Rolf's shirt and trailed kisses down his front until she reached the top of his pants. She playfully fiddled with the button of his trousers and there was that smile again. She was practically torturing him, unbuttoning and unzipping his trousers as slowly as possible until she finally took him in her mouth.

He came with a desperate cry of her name and looked down to see her with that twinkle in her eye as she wiped the semen from her mouth.

"Now," she said. "What do we say?"

Rolf smiled and stroked Luna's cheek. "I'm sorry, Luna."

"That's my boy. Want your potion now?"

"I don't think I need it."

* * *

Luna didn't usually do anal sex, but she was always up for experiments and she certainly loved to experiment with Rolf. They'd done a lot of experimenting since they moved in together and this one was certainly a success. She decided that she liked the full feeling of Rolf in her bottom and how his warmth felt on her back. She especially liked it when Rolf would tell her how good she felt while he rode her and whispered naughty things into her ear.

"Merlin, you're so lovely," he panted. "So fucking lovely!"

He was careful at first, making sure not to hurt her, but it wasn't long before he began to ride her like an animal. It was a new side to him that even Rolf was surprised by, but it did amazing things to him to hear Luna's childish voice cry out his name and beg: "Fuck me!" repeatedly. He always thought she was adorable when she swore, but hearing her in that tone just did things to him.

Rolf practically roared Luna's name when he came and he fell spent on the bed by her side. They spent a long time panting from exhaustion before Rolf rolled back on her and gently kissed the bite marks he left on her shoulder, as though to kiss them better.

"I should do that to _you_ some time," Luna chirped.

Rolf laughed against her skin. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"Of course I would! You've got a lovely bum."

* * *

Luna was soaking in the tub for an hour just singing to herself. A habit that never failed to make Rolf smile, although it was distracting him from his writing. He was trying to keep himself busy writing a new book on an incredible new breed of wood sprite that he and Luna had discovered and spent weeks studying them, but he often found his thoughts wandering to Luna's sweet voice. He must have spent the last hour refilling the cup of tea that went cold, ruffling his hair and fixing his reading glasses. He did more of that than writing.

Soon, Rolf went to the bathroom, not even bothering to knock. Luna never knocked when he was in the bath either. It was a habit they'd gotten used to.

"You're not doing me any favours with this book, you know," he said. "I've been trying to write that paragraph for the past hour."

"It's the wrakspurts, silly, not me."

"I'm not sure if wrackspurts can sing."

"Of course they do. That's why it's so hard to get rid of a song stuck in your head."

"I'm not sure they're that loud and clear, though, and I'm not sure they sound like you."

"Give me my spectrespecs."

He did and Luna inspected him.

"Definitely wrackspurts!" she said. "Too many to continue any work, but that's nothing a nice hot bath can't fix."

Rolf chuckled and gave in. He removed his clothes and plunged into the water with Luna in his arms. It certainly helped. His thoughts were no longer everywhere at once and he was at peace. It felt nice, just lying there in the tub with this amazing woman. Neither of them were sure how long they'd been lying there like that, but the water had gone cold without either of them noticing.

When they'd gotten out of the bath, Rolf put his clothes back on, but Luna didn't bother. He made no argument and he carried Luna out of the bath and into the bedroom. He rested his head on her stomach when he lay her down on the bed, just enjoying how her fingers felt running through his hair.

"Well, at least the wrackspurts are gone," he said.

"Not exactly," she replied. "I think some of them may have crawled their way into my brain."

Rolf wasn't sure it was the truth or just an excuse, but he didn't care either way. "Want me to take care of that?" he grinned.

"Please."

Luna sighed sweetly as Rolf suckled at her breasts and trailed kisses down her stomach until he reached her sex. She arched her back as she felt his tongue flicking at her clitoris and ran her fingers through his hair. He was always so giving when it came to cunnilingus and she could practically hear the wrackspurts flying away in a panic when she came.

Rolf spent the rest of the evening just kissing and caressing Luna's front, simply marvelling at the woman who made his days so much brighter than they were a year ago. He smiled warmly as he rested his head on her shoulder, just holding her and whispering in his ear what he realized just now:

"I love you."

* * *

It had been two years now and while he was much more confident than he was before he met Luna, he was still nervous as hell. Since his first time with Luna, Rolf had done things he would never have done with a woman three years ago. Three years ago, he would never have gone skinny dipping or made love in a public place. And still he was shaking like a leaf.

Funny what one little ring can do.

It was her birthday and Rolf was determined to make this evening the most romantic she'd ever have. He'd bought the finest wine he could get his paws on, played music from that muggle singer she was so fond of (Edith...Pie? Pia? Plath? No, Piaff. That was it.),made her favourite dinner and dessert, lit dozens of candles, and set up a picnic before the fireplace. Everything was prepared.

And still he kept on repeating to himself: _Please, Merlin, if you can hear me and you have any hope for the two of us, please do not make me fuck this up._

Rolf had tried and failed to be as smooth and debonair as possible, but somehow she didn't seem to mind. She just laughed and continued to enjoy a romantic meal with her boyfriend. She said he was cute when he was nervous.

"Thank you for dinner, Rolf," she said when they'd finished dessert. "It was very kind of you."

"Luna?" he said. "There's one more thing."

"Oh."

Rolf struggled to find the ring buried in his pocket, weakened by his violently trembling hands. He cursed when he finally remembered that he'd forgotten to take the bloody ring out of its hiding place. Eventually, he gave up and just took Luna's hands in his.

"Luna...I-I...I mean...Y-you...you mean everything to me and...I-I-I...that is, you've been a p-part of...me...my life! You've been a part of my life for two years and...I-I..."

_Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! D..._

Before Rolf could say another stupid word, Luna smiled and kissed him passionately.

"Of course I'll marry you, you bumbling dolt."


End file.
